Bachelor party?

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Thursday evening, I received an odd event invitation on Facebook to a friend’s bachelor party. At first glance, I thought that there had to be a mistake, but then I actually read the invitation:

**Please read the below in its entirety**

A party, to consist of a variety of both events and accommodations, will be held in the honor of one FIRST NAME (which is a made up name) LAST NAME (which is an Italian name) due to his pending marriage to someone at some time in some place (these facts are unimportant at this time).

What is important is that you* should be in attendance at the location and time listed. Expect: drinks, food, party favors, circus performers (that last one may be an exaggeration).

*you’ve probably notice those asterisks following the second-person pronoun above. I planned it that way. This “you” refers to gentlemen only. LADIES YOU ARE NOT INVITED TO THIS EVENT. Don’t get all sad about it. Just understand that if you are a lady and you received this invite, all it means is that you are NOT invited to this party. You can show up, but you will not be admitted. You will be turned away at the door. Go ahead and bring food, booze, and presents. We’ll take those, but otherwise, plan on leaving after playing the role of awesome delivery girl. Stop crying. No really, stop. You’re just embarrassing yourself. Geez, I can’t take you anywhere.

As I read it, we ladies (only me and the bride) were “invited” in order to cater this party, but not have any of the fun. Um…sorry, but that won’t be happening. While I have known these boys since high school, I’m not such a nice person that I will buy their booze or cook for them so they can party without us.

Sorry, boys.